Leaving your child Alone!

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In Human,parents is the caretaker of a child. Mother & Father is what every child wants in their life. Our identity comes from them,without them we are zero. Above god,because we haven’t seen them,but parent’s we have. They are the safe blanket,who gives us warmthness,who nurture us,who guides us our entire life,who holds our little finger and teach us how to walk. They are our god,our messenger,our identity,our roots,our roof,our protector and they are the only one whom we can claim. They are the one,whom we can count for everything anything in this world. Only people in this world,whom we can depend our life and have faith. Devastating feeling of them not being in our life,stomach churns of having thoughts of loosing them. The most precious and priceless people in our life. We are open book for them,can never hide our feelings. They are our scanner,we can never hide or lie to them. They are the most beautiful with pure soul people we have in our life. They are our GOD!

When every child speak their first word is either “Ma” or “Pa”. Nine months every mother holds their child inside in their womb,fetal turns into life. Isn’t it too amazing,how one small blood transforms into human form. A mother who has maternal connection with every child she carries,whether raising or giving birth. Her Womb is so warm,you can feel the heart beat of your mother and the mother can feel the child. It takes my breath away when i think of this beautiful creation. Amazing feeling of holding your child,hearing their first cry,feeling their soft skin,holding their little finger,their innocent face and their first smile. It is an amazing feeling of being mother and every women goes through this process,its a rebirth to a women while giving birth to a child. Words are less to describe of being mother. All i can say is I am eagerly waiting for that day to come in my life,who is going to call me “Mother”.

So,the same parent when leaves their child hand,and leaves them for their own desire by not thinking how that little one is going to face this world. So,are they really our safe blanket? Are they really our god? Are they our protector? Were they the same people who has bought us into this world? What are they? I am completely lost what should i consider them as? What happen to the emotion,connection,love,care,and resposibilites towards your child. Hunderd and thousand of children are abandoned by their parents. My question is why would you bring your child,when you know you cannot fulfil your duty of being parent. Rather you abort that small fetal before you bring them into this world and make them suffer the entire life. Depriving your child for love,love is what their support to move towards their life,they are our oxygen. What happen when you don’t get oxygen,don’t we die? How can they kill us when they have given us life. How can they forget we belong to them,we are their creation and they forgot about us without blinking their eyes. When you have killed your own creation with your own hand and abandoned them with no fear,i won’t call them “GOD”. I along with thousand of other kids has suffered. We live in fear every single day,when we look back there is no one standing behind us to hold. Opening a door of empty house every single day,can only see furniture and walls. My stomach churns,i have cried many nights missing their warmthness,missing mothers hand food,fathers yelling and they opening door when we come home. Are we safe is their question? and we always happen to reply random answers. I don’t know the feeling neither many other children does. We are home alone child.

We are disheartened,suffocated,deprived,crave for the warmth,we crave to see their face their presence and we simply miss them. When your friends leave your hand,you forget after a while,but when your parents leaves our hand our wold falls apart. Pain of loosing them,i can only see the darkness. Their roll matters a lot in every individual children who are born in this world. I highly respect single parents who has ride their kid,who teaches them values and stand by them. Hats of to those parents who deprive their desire and take cares of their child. And i am lost again,what should i call the other parents,who leaves their child alone. We have been looking for an answer since the time we were born,but haven’t found one. This lifetime seems difficult for me and for many other children. Well i am saving my feelings to become a mother one day soon in this lifetime. Will be eagrly waiting to hear Mother word from my very own child.

Either you tell me i am courageous enough to share about my story or i am being voice of other many children who has come to this world. Pain changes people,pain has changed me. Everything is going to be alright,may be not today but eventually on that hope we are living. Time does not heal you to be very honest,but it has teaches me how to live with the pain. I am really very tired of this never ending pain,i did not deserve this pain. When i am alone i think them,when i think of them i remember,when i remember them i feel pain,when i feel pain,i cry,when i cry i cannot stop thinking about them. It just hurts a lot.

So are they god?

AintTully.

 

Women,we are the Universe!

Indian Art Women painting 1I will define my beauty! We are the creator,we have created world,we are unreal,we are beautiful and without us world is nothing. We are blessed with enough patience to stay and enough strength to move on. We are an art,we are an inspiration,we are fire,we are centre of the earth and we are mother of all. See me,love me,accept me for who i am. Our responsibilities towards universe is never ending,we have to keep moving on. Our pillow gets wet with our tears,many uncountable nights goes by,but every morning seems like we weren’t crying previous night. Strength is my weakness but i make my weakness strength.

We as a women grow mature very fast then our age. Situation which we face in our life makes us tough and we stand by our people.We are like a volcano,don’t touch us or else when we erupt,we take entire world down. We are the five elements of nature earth,water,fire,air and sky. We are the distroyer at the same time we are a creator. We are mother of all. We are the sun and the moon at night,meaning we are the circular shape of symbol of the never ending circle of life and the moon is associated with female in many cultures often form of a goddess.

The prettiest smile hides the deepest secrets,the prettiest eyes cries the most tears and the beautiful hearts felt the most pain. When we have taken oath to protect everyone,when we have taken responsibilities,we women,I as a woman will always do our duty. Duty towards our family,our friends and our loved ones. We are what we are,god has created us different than others,we will rise and lift each and everyone around us. We have different faces,as mother,as daughter,as sister and a wife. Our duty towards them will never forget and we will take as day goes by. We are clothed in strength and dignity and we laugh without fear of the future. We women,I as a woman very proud to be a gods creation. Nothing can dim the light,that shines from within. We women,I as a woman confident because i can admit who,i am,what i have done,love myself for who i have become.

“A successful woman is one who can build a firm foundation with the bricks other has thrown at her” We will decide,commit and succeed in our life. We are pure,we are beautiful,we are strong,we are everyone’s inspiration,we are gods creation and we are amazingly beautiful inside and out. Like how William Congreve said,”Women,like flames,have destroying power,never to be quenched till they themselves devour”.

Happy Women’s day to my beautiful ladies,who has come into this world. Will take a leave and hoping i have bought smile on each and every women who has read about us. Time for me to close my kitchen,see you all soon with different me,till then take good care of your self.

Ain’tTully xoxo

 

 

Demon calls me his Angel!

Black is my colour,symbol of the power of darkness,symbol of death and the same time very attractive colour. Demon was an angel before and every angel,demon hides. So,he calls me his angel and i call him demon! This story is about me and my demon.

Our story starts he calling me an angel. So,i tell him,i ain’t angel i am a devil. He says demon?i said yes correctly said,i am demon. He laughed his guts out,he kept on laughing for a while and i giggled. We were paused for a while,so i asked what happen? he said,i am liking our conversation. I told him when two similar like minded people are talking,best part is don’t have to describe word to word. He says absolutely correct. We kept on talking very first time,when we chatted over the phone after previous meeting. Our talk never ended,we just went with the flow. Funny part is every discussion we had,got more interesting and we shared a lot that paticular night. Basically,its compatibility,meaning able to exist or occur together without problems.

It was an amazing feeling,after ages i found someone who’s thoughts are  very similar like mine. Demon was just listening to his angel,and i kept talking. I was just talking after a longer period of time :). He just did not stop me at all,we both were going with flow. Flow was unstoppable,flow did not notice the clock,flow did not realised the sunrise,our bonding was so pure. That paticular night i slept like a baby. So,demon was an angle once. He surly is my demon,who makes me alive,who gives me strength,make me wonder why and how he has fallen on my plate. After saying good night to him,i started thinking was that phone call real or i was having imaginary dream,where world seems to be to perfect. Endless converstation made us want to have more conversation every day. I started liking the way we clicked and understood each other so well. Need not needed to talk sometimes. When i be quiet he ask me what happen? i tell him nothing,just! he says the same when i ask him. I was enjoying our silence,where you just feel the moment and live in that moment. So,tell me isn’t compatibility very important in each and everyone’s life. God, i am so pleased,nothing more to ask.

He listens to me morning,evening and before sunrise. He is my cozy corner,or shall i say safe blanket,or shall i say my person,who is always ready to hear me. Demon made me smile once again,desire started building up,feeling started developing,thought process became different,the way i started looking at life changed. Yes,he is my demon and he gives me happiness. I simply adore the way we both are. I remember one song of John Mayer “your body is wonderland” that’s how my demon makes me feel. Well i won’t be able to stop writing about him,its never ending story of ours. What ever is happening in my life,i am grateful and got no complain. I feel we all should have our demon in life,waited for so long and found one,that’s how he has fallen on my plate.

He is my devil,he is my angel,he is my heaven,he is my hell,he is my demon,mine just mine :). Demon once was an angel. Like how Christopher Poindexter said,”Chaos is an angel,who fell in love with a demon”. “Do not fall in love with my demon,when you leave they will wreak havoc within me”. I have found my demon,hope you all do too. I have expressed my feelings,my small story which exsist in this lifetime. As i am not a writer but i love to share about my life and will continue sharing with you all.

With all your permission i am taking leave,and shall go see what’s cooking in my kitchen for my guest in my restuarant TullyGully.

Unknown“I have an angel on one shoulder,and a demon on the other”. So,yes he calls me his angel and i call him my demon,mine and only mine!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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She says,she is not ready yet!

I wonder when we are ever ready for a commitment? I had a conversation this morning with a very dear friend of mine. She told me she will be seekPlaceholder Imageing someone,when she is ready. I wonder how and when we are ready to bite the bullet. Does commitment scares all of us? or we just don’t want to walk into that path ever? Each and everyone of us have different way of looking at life. Well let me share my thoughts with you all and see how much you all agree to it.

We come to this world alone,and when we leave our people behind we go alone. The fact and the biggest truth of all our lives. We intent to forget that in-between we all are doing “timepass”. Yes time pass is the easiest word that i can find to put it across you all.Life is beautiful and full of surprises,thats what i feel though we face many hurdles while completing our journey. I personally take all the situation as it comes in my daily life,and i pretty sure everyone does in the same manner too. I ain’t saint,i am a very ordinary person,has done many mistakes in life and my action has spoken louder than a gun shoot. I have fallen on my face hundred of times,it hurt,it did hurt,i felt like snake byte and turned blue completely. So,yes i ain’t saint,and will never try to be one either. Happiness and sorrow two strong fact of life again,and its part of our package. Life can never be easy,but it is just the way we take it. Life is the best education i have ever gained,nothing can beat life experience. Like how Gautam Buddha himself has enlightened himself by walking his journey.

Relationship is like a golden thread,every relation we built in this lifetime come with compromise. Yes,compromise all we can do and lets do it gracefully. I know,we are not satisfied but we have to live with the facts. Hey,i am still learning and turned 32 this year to be very precise. Fallen many times on my face and risen up again. After learning from mistakes yet i do many till todays date,but not ashamed of addmitting at all. Lets love people who are very dear to us,who values our relation and keep smiling,what may come. Once we are born,we are born. No one has seen future coming in advance,nor we can sit and predict about what next or else life would have been fairy tale. I,I want to live with my people in this lifetime,laugh loud in this lifetime,cry and ask for their shoulder in this lifetime,share my happiness in this lifetime,i just want to live with loved one in this lifetime,that’s all.

So,yes guys lets live and bring smile on everyone around us. I think we all can promise ourself and keep trying every single day. I try my best to do,like my Hindi is like Deepika Padukone chennai express :)!! So,everyone laugh at my Hindi,i feel hey because of me my people are laughing :)!! Lets give love and accept from your loved one gracefully. I won’t be taking so much time of you all,signing of on this note. Time for me to take care of my business and see whats cooking for my guest. Catch you all soon with some other topic. You all have a great week.

So,is she ever going to be ready,are we also ready yet?

Ain’tTully XOXO

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cheese lover pizza :)

Entered the kitchen and saw the pizza base,as soon as i touched told my chef don’t want any complain cause it was hard. Guess what? ordered came very instant for cheese lover pizza. Prepared in 15 minutes and served hot cheesy thin crust pizza. My prediction was so very true,guest complaint came by saying pizza is tasty but the base is so very hard. When i tasted as guest mentioned it was tasty but base was bloody hard like a dog biscuit.  While i am signing of,yet another base in the oven 🙂